AWK Insults The Sky Marshal

Yesterday I received an email from the Lead Voyageur, Aaron W. K.  (a.k.a. AWK), who defamed me by stating,

“First Facebook, then a cellphone, now a blog…I’m not sure I know who this  is.”

Just as I am attempting to improve my life as a disabled BWCA Canoe Tripper that arrogant drudge starts pissing on my technology parade. Merely because he has advanced to Lead Voyageur in a relatively short time frame does not permit him to insult the Sky Marshal of the Aurora Borealis, Voyageur Emeritis. Should he maintain this petulant behavior I shall invoke all my power, control and authority to restrict his advancement to the Voyageur Emeriti. He can be a peckerhead with the FNG’s, SNAG’s and Piragis Dudes but not the esteemed conclave of the Emeriti. At this juncture I would not mind reducing him in rank to a Porkeater or BW Cherry.

Is AWK truly Leadership Material?

The only thing that saves his ass at this inquietude is the fact that his father, Uncle Bill,  is an original patrician of the Voyageur Emeriti. It must be, however, a genetic disposition of the family  planta to probe and torment the Sky Marshal as AWK’s father has been doing such for over thirty years. The Lead Voyageur must set an appropriate example for fellow Voyageurs and especially the Porkeaters, BW Cherry’s and FNG’s. Insulting denegration of the Sky Marshal is in fact contraindicated. Despite my capacity for continued elucidation on the matter I shall close by stating,

“Hey Aaron, you Paska Housut, Haista Vittu!”

I remain faithful to those of you who truly love me,

The Sky Marshal of the Aurora Borealis